As I ride down to church with my family this morning, I began to read a devotional. This morning, I fell into daydreaming and fantasy as a mental escape instead of opening up God’s word first. Once I came too, we were significantly behind in schedule and needed to hustle to leave the house, which is why my quiet time happened in the car this morning.
I read the scripture passage and began to read the devotional part. I must have started, stopped, and reread the same paragraph what felt like 20 times before I was able to finish! I kept being interrupted! Hubby wanted to talk. Jazmine had things to say. It was a tag-team effort 😄.
I would have lashed out. I would have fussed. I would have done something or said something to show my displeasure at their behavior while I was reading. But God! I recognized their need for me. I poured out the patience God pours into me. I listened. I asked questions. When they had exhausted their verbal reserves, I finished that paragraph of my devotional.
I am so glad God sees me, knows me, and keeps me in the midst of life. He will do the same for you.
I like spending time with Jesus by myself. All alone. Just me and Him. Bible open. Soaking it all up.
I have recently gone through a biblical renovation as a mother and how I live with and in front of my children (more to come on that later). Those changes caused me to see this mornings quiet time differently.
Baby Grace had just completed her second round of breakfast and was playing nicely. I took that time to catch up on my devotional. I am trying to lose weight so I had taken a supplement a bit earlier and needed to eat something immediately. I got my cheese and crackers, opened my devotional and got ready to dive in. Shortly thereafter, there was a whine and patting of my leg. I picked Baby Grace up and gave her her third round of breakfast. Once I got her situated on my lap, I began to read scripture out loud.
This was not the scene I had envisioned but God spoke to me just then. “What better way to have quiet time with Me then to share it with her?” It was a very sweet and tender moment. Me, the baby I asked God, prayed, and fasted for, spending time with the One who brought us together.
What an awesome way to begin a day.
Our Sunday service begins at 11:30AM. Baby Grace’s nap usually starts around 11:30AM. Because Baby Grace is so alert, getting from her from the car into church does not happen without her waking up. She will then stay awake until after we get back in the car after service is over. It is COMPLETELY off of her schedule! We usually have a pretty cranky baby girl on our hands until bedtime.
Being First Lady is hard. I want to serve side-by-side with my husband. I want to be there with him. The girls and I are his cheering squad, with me being the head cheerleader. I don’t like being late to church or causing us to run behind. I like to walk into church with him, as a family. After a few Sunday’s of having a cranky baby girl, I finally told my husband that I think it best if I stay in the car with her so she can sleep as long as she can. That usually results in me missing all but the sermon but the baby and the rest of our family has a much more enjoyable day.
One such Sunday, I was feeling pretty pitiful about being in the car, not going inside. I didn’t have my quiet time before leaving home that morning so I sat in the car doing a devotional, feeling lonely. I watched other members enter the building and was helpless to explain why I, First Lady, the Pastor’s wife, was in the car with a sleeping baby while my husband and oldest daughter were inside.
The devotional I was reading referenced Isaiah 40:11 which says, “He will feed His flock like a shepherd; He will gather the lambs with His arm, And carry them in His bosom, And gently lead those who are with young.”
I could have jumped for joy! “And gently lead those who are with young”! That’s a Mommy! That’s ME! ME! I am pretty sure it didn’t look like I was being a model Christian that morning. I sure didn’t feel like it and if I had seen me in the car not going into service, I would have passed judgement on myself. But God! It didn’t look like it to me, but my Sunday morning car devotional was acceptable in His sight. He is the God who sees (Beer Lahai Roi), knows, and understands. Hallelujah! Amen!