It’s been a long time since I have been crapped on. I mean publicly humiliated, hurt.
I noticed a rift in one of my relationships. I tried to make excuses for it and monitor it to see if things went back to normal. They did not. In fact, they got noticeably worse. It really REALLY bothered me. After seeking counsel from three people, one of which was my husband, I decided to write the person a note. I was honest and sincere. I asked if I had done something wrong and why the sudden change in behavior towards me. My letter was infraction specific and very open-ended.
I received a timely and lengthy response. I was very appreciative of that but the note did not bring the reconciliation that I very much sought. The person, who I highly respected and appreciated, said they basically now viewed me as competition and that she was good on her end.
Her response was close ended. There was no room for discussion or explanation. I responded saying that I was glad we both are good. Truth be told, I am not good. I am working my way towards good but she left no indication that there was anything left between us. I know where I stand in her eyes. How she feels is how she feels but the reality is, it is not true. I am not in competition with her. I never have been and that was never on my mind.
I specifically asked her why she did not help me and she did not answer that question directly in her response but today, she put someone else on display and helped them. Had this been a week ago, I would have just cried. Today, I am just really sad.
We met through a shared fitness class. She went on to become a proprietor and I became her client. During that time, we became, or so I thought, friends. Today, she sees me as her competition and has essentially shut the door to anything else.
I think it could be resolved with just one conversation but it can’t if only one person is willing. I thought of the misunderstanding between Iyanla and Oprah that lasted for 10 years. I hope it doesn’t take that long for this person to grow through and receive my sincerity of heart.