Remember when I cut my stepchildren off? Yes, well, I have had to go deeper into those feelings to see what was really growing there. My prayers have changed for those children also. I used to have specific prayers for each of them and I prayed for them, out of obligation if truth be told.
I was thinking about my big kids today and my true desire for them was clear for me to see. I started out by saying what I really wanted. What I long for is for Bella, Scott, and Anthony to love Brian (my husband for those who don’t know). I want them to include him in their thoughts. I want them to want to talk to him, to share their lives with him. I want them to respect him.
That became my new prayer for all of five minutes because as I was praying for that, I was convicted that I was praying a lie and that lie, if allowed to come into fruition, would harm our family unit. Why? Because I would be praying for division. Praying for my stepchildren to love their father was exclusive of Jazmine and I. Praying that they would call and express concern for their father would marginalize us even more. That is when I birthed the truth from my lips. I want my stepchildren to love all of us; my husband, my daugther, and myself.
I want my stepchildren to embrace us all as a family unit that they are apart of. I want them to love us and care for us, to include us (positively) in their thoughts and express that love in their actions. I want them to come over just because they want to be here regardless of who is actually home at the time.
That is a rather large prayer request considering the state of things but that is my heart open to God about my stepchildren.