Dear SAHM

I had a SAHM epiphany tonight.

(This is published in real-time post.  I have not had a post since May 20.  I have much I can write but now is not the time)

I have had a overcoming couple of days. Fighting to keep control of my mind from the assaults of the devil. During this time of warfare, I have neglected my household duties. Not completely but more than I should have allowed.

The weather has finally made up its mind so I began the long process of switching out our winter clothes. Our bedroom looked like a mine field. My toilets had not been cleaned in weeks (I can not tell you how mortified I am at  having to pen that statement and it be true of me). The carpeted floor underneath where we eat our meals was filthy. It made me wish we had a dog so he could help me with the appearance of Jazmine’s spot at the table. The kitchen floor was marked up and our bathroom floor was not fit for company.

The house screams of “clean me” and “I need attention” were depressing but I could not find the umph to do any significant work.  Our guest bathroom was not filthy.  I had spot cleaned it but not deep cleaned it as I would normally do.  Although our laundry baskets were full of dirty clothes, we had plenty of clean (draws) clothes so there was no rush there.  Because we were having guests yesterday evening, I vacuumed the carpet floor and had Jazmine put all of her toys away.  The main floor looked presentable but I saw the lies. I knew the house wasn’t in its proper state.

Today, I had some much needed time to myself. My mother-in-law took Jaz with her and my husband gave me space. I got to chit-chat with a good friend of mine in private without listening ears, AND (this is the best part) there was a Criminal Minds marathon on A&E today!  I had a most wonderful afternoon!

Somewhere around six o’clock, umph found me. I said to myself, “I can clean the toilets while everyone is gone.” By the time I had solidified that thought and got up to get started, I quickly expanded that plan to include the kitchen and the bathrooms. In the next 7 hours I completed the following tasks: cleaned the toilets, cleaned the guest bathroom (sink, mirror, vacuum and mop floor) cleaned our bathroom (sink, mirror, shower, vacuum and mop floor), vacuumed and mopped kitchen floor, finished swapping out winter clothes, bagged clothes to be given away and put them in the car, packed up Jazmine’s winter clothes that she might be able to wear again, ate dinner, sorted laundry, washed three loads, put one load away, sewed a button back on, went through a pile of mail, shredded junk mail with personal information, put away a shipment of vitamins, showered Jazmine (she took herself to bed), and brushed my teeth (not necessarily in that order.  Jazmine was in the bed WELL before the writing of this post).

I just so happened to look at the clock.  It read 12:53AM. That is when I had the epiphany.  I just worked a 7-hr workday!

As a SAHM, sometimes it is hard for me to quantify what I do because things like laundry don’t have a deadline. Having worked and know what an 8-hr workday feels like, I often overlook the work I put in at home.  If I were to quantify what I do in and for the house every day, I would probably be up to at least 12-hrs average!

So, if you are like me and struggle at times to see your value at home as being valuable in comparison to the work you knew you were putting in at your  job, remember what you just read. We put in hard and long hours too!

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