I feel I should apologize for not posting last Monday. However, I have said before, if I don’t feel led to write about something, I won’t. Last week I sat down to write but nothing came to mind to bear so no post.
I wrote the following post as one original work, however, its length is over 1,200 words so I broke it up into two parts. I skim things that are lengthy unless they are concise and even then I look for lines to skip so to keep you from having to do that, here is part 1.
I became so desperate for Christ to move financially in our lives that I fasted and prayed. I’m not sure if you know this but I enjoy food. I enjoy food so much that for me to even consider fasting is a big deal. I began fasting Friday, November 2. I wanted God to do what He said He would do for us now. To me, He was late. The time He said to me had past and no matter how much I tried to justify or make what I heard wrong I could not. I know God said seven years and that time had passed. My fast began as a way to “encourage God along”. Maybe if I showed Him I was serious by fasting, He would move on our behalf.
Initially, as I said, I was fasting for a financial breakthrough but I was more specific than just that. I wanted my house He promised me and my twin boys (not necessarily in that order; simultaneously would have been good though). That’s what I was fasting for. The next day, Saturday, November 3, God led me to change the purpose of my fast. Instead of fasting for my wants, I was to fast for my husband’s wants. Without being to specific for his sake, I can tell you that I fasted for Brian would be and do everything God has created him to be and wired him to do.
My fast would be until something happened. Along the way, several things seemed to start happening, and I would get excited about it but it wasn’t conclusive so I continued to fast. And, sure enough, it’s a good thing I didn’t stop at the first hint of glitter because it certainly wasn’t gold. Although I settled myself in my mind to fast indefinitely, I had also determined to fast at least until the end of 2012. After that, I figured I would continue to fast but regroup or get my mind right about it if nothing had changed at that point.
I know the old adage that people say about God. “He may not come when you want Him but He’s always on time”. I can’t say that has been my experience. Never mind. I’m going to just go ahead and say it. That did not happen for me. I feel like Saul did when he was waiting for Samuel to come and Samuel was apparently late (1 Samuel 13: 8-12). Yes. Saul’s attitude was wrong. He was for appearances but nevertheless, Samuel was not there when he said he would be there. That would have caused me concern also. I wonder if everyone who says the old adage says it after they have come through something or while they are in the midst. I want to come through this and still say to the contrary, that God did not come when I wanted and His timing was off for me but He did come and deliver. That would be more truthful than saying what has been told over the years. Besides, the old adage is not biblical. It’s no more biblical than saying “God helps those who help themselves”, which is pure bull. If we could help ourselves, why would we need Christ? Hmm?
I need to insert here that my fast was from food from the time I awoke to noon that same day, everyday.
This ends part 1…