It is very discouraging to go from having an average of 10 hits per day to none. It makes me feel as if I don’t need to stick to my blog frequency since no one is reading it anyway. I know that is not true. Somewhere along the line, someone may find this blog helpful to themselves or someone they know. It may not be today, and according to my stats, it certainly hasn’t in the last few weeks, but it will happen.
I struggle with finding ways to get it out there. It was easy to post it to my social networks but doing that made it impossible to be anonymous. It also made for uncomfortable conversations with people I know that have not yet met my bonus children. They would ask me about them, wanting names, ages, and other common kid facts but I did not want to have those conversations with them. That conversation took me by surprise and I was not prepared to handle it. I didn’t know I could have said something like, “I do not get into detail about my bonus children outside of the blog.”
One upside to seemingly starting from scratch again with this blog is that I am now free to speak more openly about what goes on without fear of discovery. This blog is not written for my bonus children so they don’t need to come across it. This blog is not written for their mother’s so they don’t need to come across it either. Now, if they did, I would not be bothered at all. My only concern would be that they would share the blog with my bonus children.
Sadly, this newfound freedom has come with a price. I’ve gone from being #4 in the Google world of my former name to practically invisible in the world-wide web.