As mature as a Christian as I believe I am, I still have pet peeves and things that get on my nerves and under my skin. There I said it. It is a hard thing to admit because I still operate under the misguided thought process that maturity means the absence of irritants. If that was true, I don’t think anyone would be mature. What we do when we are irritated shows how mature we are. If we act a fool, we are immature. If we are able to continue doing what needs to be done, without taking out our feelings on others, then we are headed in the right direction.
One of my biggest pet peeves, and unfortunately I have many, is having my schedule interrupted. I can’t stand it. However, being an bonus mom means that anything I may have on my calendar is subject to adjustment at a moments notice. I am not saying that everything is written in pencil just because I am an bonus mom but there are things that I must be flexible about wether I like it or not. (That is my choice. It is a decision that I made when I choose to marry my husband. He had children before we married. I am his helpmate and I choose to be flexible and to help him in any way I can.) One of those “wether I like it or not” things is my Sunday schedule. I prefer to attend 8 o’clock church service. Sunday is pick-up and drop-off day at the Green’s. My oldest son is picked up and my bookends get dropped off. The times vary from week to week depending on what we have going on, what their moms have going on, and what time people leave to make said pick-ups and drop-offs. My husband is an ordained minister which means he must attend both services at our church (8AM and 11AM service). He typically will meet the mother of my bookends late afternoon Sunday. My oldest son is usually picked up in the morning after 8AM service.
Here’s the monkey wrench. As much as I prefer going to the early service, I have accepted that because of the schedule I have Jazmine on during the week, 11AM service works best for her right now. Because of that, we go to 11AM service. Because my oldest son gets picked up somewhere in the 11AM service time frame, I can’t get there. It is difficult enough for me to get myself and Jazmine to 8 o’clock service let alone getting my big kids out the door as well. Praise be to God, there is a church in our town that has an evening service that I attended last week. I felt so at home there. I now have a place to go when I am not able to get to our home church because of my first ministry; my family.
That whole scenario was a hard pill to swallow because I hate having my schedule interrupted especially when I have to miss church! I kept thinking, I need to hear the Word! What about me? What about Jazmine? I’m her mom. I have to get her to church. Her father, my husband, is already there. How is she going to be brought up in church when she isn’t there? I am on the nursery ministry at our church as well and I didn’t want to turn into a I-only-come-to-church-on-the-day-I-serve-on-my-ministry member either.
Well, God certainly solved that problem. I didn’t like it at first which is why I didn’t even consider attending another service at another church as a possibility. I wanted it worked out so that all adults involved understood, respected, and accepted my Sunday schedule. I wanted others to place the same importance on my need to be in worship service as I had.
Our family’s calling is different. My husband was called to preach the Word. His presence in church is required (for all intents and purposes). When the head of the household is called, the family is called as well. It just so happens that not all of our family members live under our roof so we have to make adjustments. When you are apart of a ministry that requires your service Sunday after Sunday, you have to commit to it. You can’t pick and choose what Sundays and what service you are going to attend. You can’t “be like everybody else”. So, my family is not like everybody else and I cannot expect those outside of this household to operate as we do. Neither can I expect for others to respect my desire to be in service above all else when they themselves do not operate under that same thought process.
The bottom line? I must adjust. As admirable as my desire to be in service is, I must do what needs to be done. I can kick and scream and buck at the thought of having my plans altered in this area or I can accept it knowing that I am still being pleasing to my Lord and Savior. You see, even thought it wouldn’t be my husband whom I was angry with, he was the one feeling the heat from me. I didn’t see how I could still be pleasing to the Lord if I wasn’t in service on Sunday every Sunday. It wasn’t until I attended evening service last week and saw that one of the ministers wives wasn’t there because she was at home with their three young children that it hit me. Taking care of my family so that my husband can be available to others and preach the Word is a ministry and it is my ministry also.